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a benny hymn

from desperate songs by great friend of mine

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lyrics

“Save me: my bleeding eyes, my hollow skull!

“Heal me: my aching teeth, my weeping soul!

“A man fell from the sky a month ago. They tell me he has hooves for feet, talons for hands, the eyes of a fly, and the snout of a rat. They tell me he is still a man.

“He looked tall on his soapbox and I couldn’t make out his features from where I stood, but his words were dripping, falling, crawling right up into my ears. They tickled those tiny hairs:

‘My knees are raw, close to bone!
But what a great thing I have been shown!
For God gave me a great gift!
I will take your problems, blow them away,
and let the drift!’

“O my god, I laughed—I thought of a solar eclipse I saw as a boy; eyes pressed to that cardboard box. Mercury shining red—alive. A sun-flare in a textbook I came across—I laughed while the ground resisted my feet and the wind blew against my face.

“I will never forget my place—my father was a sailor, rough hands and wind swept hair. My mother was a whore; she knew that life was sometimes too hard to bear. I am their son—a calm, a whisper of wind, a storm of passion, a calculated whim—when the earth sways I do not run, I walk with adjusting feet and quarter bent knees, picking a path down a narrow street.

“I laughed until I saw the surgeon’s kit—a child with his hands sewn together, mumbling, ‘I will live forever.’ With removed brain, eyes, and tongue—with broken legs, so he couldn’t run.

“I wailed and screamed, cursed that man who let death define his name: ‘A shame to life you are—I see that gold wrapped around your fingers: The bondage of kings! The envy of men! Pilfered from the poor to pay for a wreck! Cure the mind with the wave of a hand, but let the body still, fester, and rot!’

“They still tell me he is a man. I weep for the lot, the ostrich.”

credits

from desperate songs, released March 7, 2009

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